keef dot org shows no signs of lethality or psychosis

DJ Narcodrone: mp3 = file format
DJ Keef: DSL = dirk sackin’ lops
DJ Narcodrone: melting bodies with stevia = fund the american war machine
DJ Keef: “Combat” brand roach poison = harvested FDR clone pheromones
DJ Narcodrone: combat with mom = my daily sociopathic ritual = wish my dad was the one judging me now
DJ Keef: “biological parents” = vat-grown cyborgs, their skulls packed with excised rat brains, then possessed by the metalectronic oversouls of the ‘lectroids, trying to keep you from achieving your full potential
DJ Narcodrone: daddy style = the appearance of myself with a cane expressing my skill as a lover to young women of the world = also repping my friend keef who helped establish my cred = honing of goetic magick in a texas swamp = love online for the first time in years
DJ Keef: Tiredness at mid-day = a harbinger of good things to come; the brightness of a lighter’s flash caught reflected in a side-view mirror; a crisp autumn pear cut in half to reveal no seeds inside, just blank white flesh all the way through; what the pit / stone / seed at the center of the moon actually looks like
DJ Narcodrone: You + me = road mirage = Luciferian tango = guiltlessness = the hint of salt = some Nordic blood = friends of whittlers = first sincere stone age smiling
DJ Keef: the future = my smile as heard through a long-distance telephone line; your realization of the relativistic geological distances between the plateaus and canyons of your own fingerprints, and the greater relevance of this differential; an unspooled cassette tape recorded backwards, then released from the cracked backseat window of a Ford Econoline Van as a missive to Mother Nature.
DJ Narcodrone: 🙂
DJ Keef: 🙂

Bill: APD Investigation Shuts Down 3 BBQ Restaurants For Meat Theft
Keef: Holy shit!
Bill: Yeah! “Operation Meat Locker.”
Keef: If they were that eager to get their hands on some high quality meat, they coulda just given me twenty dollars.
Keef: HA HAAAAAA!
Bill: yeah, but they’d need more than just a child’s bbq plate portion to keep Sam’s open.
Bill: OHHHHHHHHH!
Keef: OHHHHH SNAAAAAAP!
Keef: It seems weird that they’d wanna use HEB.
Keef: I’m sure there are meat-slingin’ wholesalers they could have stolen from.
Bill: Well, I’m thinking they knew somebody at HEB who was ripping the store off.
Keef: Ah yeah, that makes sense.
Bill: I don’t think they were sending in some dude who was sticking it down his pant legs like in “Street Trash.”
Bill: HEB Loss Prevention did a piss-poor job if that was how it worked.

(ten minutes later)

Bill: DUDE
Bill: THEY WERE JUST SHOVING IT DOWN THEIR PANTS
Bill: Restaurant Workers Charged With Buying Stolen Meat
Bill: I figured it was dudes on the loading dock or whatever– that’s who got busted at Target usually.
Keef: My favorite part is that the article uses the verb “shoving.”
Keef: SHOVING!
Keef: Very evocative.
Bill: Yeah. Especially when you think of it in terms of racks of ribs and whole chickens.

DJ Hamhock: I want to get a tattoo of you on my back.
DJ Hamhock: Right in the middle of it.
DJ Hamhock: Underneath your face, it will say “The Beard.”
DJ Keef: YEAH!
DJ Keef: If you’d like, I can accompany you to the tattoo parlor of your choice and pose for the artist.  With or without a shirt.  Your decision.
DJ Hamhock: No. I want to use the photo from your facebook profile.
DJ Keef: Well, true artists say that there’s no substitute for working from real life.
DJ Keef: But I respect your decision.

PREFACE:  The person herein referred to as “DJ Skoopz” is a person that until recently was a co-worker of mine, and has since left to work at a local chain of ice cream shoppes.  The chain at which she works is well-known for having old-school analog photobooths.

DJ Keef: MAKE ME SOME ICE CREAM!
DJ Skoopz: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
DJ Keef: Is that your answer because you are not at work, DJ Skoopz? I think if you were at work and if I were a customer your answer would be entirely different.
DJ Keef: Does your location have a functional photobooth?
DJ Skoopz: Not yet. We haven’t really opened yet. But when we do, you shall be informed.
DJ Keef: Are y’all planning to have a functional photobooth? The photobooths are one of the main reasons I go to that chain of stores.
DJ Skoopz: Yeesssssss.
DJ Keef: Last month I went to SIX DIFFERENT LOCATIONS trying to find a functional photobooth. Only the South Lamar location had one that worked. The one at Westgate ate my money and didn’t spit out any photos. All the rest just had signs saying they were resting.
DJ Skoopz: I’ll ask about this.
DJ Keef: Well. You shouldn’t do anything that might get you in hot water.
DJ Keef: Let’s leave that for the scoops!
DJ Keef: HA HA HA HA HA
DJ Keef: HA
DJ Keef: HA
System Message: DJ Skoopz has gone offline.

DJ Unique: What is a word for being made enthusiastic about something?
DJ Unique: like motivated, but not
DJ Keef: Like when you have been “sold” on something?
DJ Unique: No.
DJ Keef: What’s the context?
DJ Unique:“I also wanted to thank you for taking the time to show us around. I was very impressed and … by your program.”
DJ Keef: Excited?
DJ Unique: Perhaps.
DJ Keef: Enthralled?
DJ Unique: Nah.
DJ Keef: Embonered?
DJ Unique: Yes.
DJ Unique: “Dear Rebecca, I was embonered by your youth center and would like to help you realize your new curriculum.”
DJ Keef: You’re welcome.
DJ Unique: Thank you. I think that shows not only professionalism, but grace.

DJ Stereo: http://www.amazon.com/JBL-10-Two-Way-Bookshelf-Speakers/dp/B000O8SKZA/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=electronics&qid=1304527657&sr=1-2
DJ Stereo: No comments? I am aghast.
DJ Keef: Oh, did you not already order them?
DJ Stereo: Don’t be silly, Keith, of course I ordered them.
DJ Keef: Good man, good man.
DJ Stereo: I still have room in my home that must be filled with equipment!
DJ Keef: Hm.  You know what you should do instead?
DJ Keef: Have you ever seen or read anything about Temple Grandin?
DJ Stereo: not that I recall, no
DJ Keef: Okay, well, she’s a high-level autistic.  She was played by Claire Danes in some TV thing recently.  Anyway, the point is that she invented a hug machine: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hug_machine
DJ Keef: You should make one.
DJ Keef: Except instead of blankets, yours will be made out of stereo components.  So every day, you can climb into it and feel as though you are being slowly crushed by stereo parts and speakers.  Which is what you clearly desire.
DJ Stereo: That’s already happening, though.
DJ Keef: Clearly, it’s not.  Or at least, not fast enough for you.
DJ Keef: You could just line one of your closets with all this shit and then like wedge yourself into it at night to sleep.
DJ Keef: “Grandin’s device did not meet with unmitigated approval at first, as psychologists at her high school sought to confiscate her prototype hug machine.”
DJ Stereo: My closet is also lined with stereo shit, other components not currently in use.  But once this pair of bookshelf speakers arrives, I’ll have enough to do themed rooms.
DJ Stereo: a JBL room, an Infinity room, and a Polk audio room.
DJ Stereo: I’m gonna have to do some funky wiring though, once they get here, since the amp in the bedroom only drives one speaker pair.
DJ Stereo: I’ll have to do a “parallel-series” wiring to keep the impedance at 8 ohms.
DJ Keef: Then maybe later you can masturbate on a circuitboard.
DJ Keef: While pressing your face into a first pressing vinyl record of “Blue Monday.”
DJ Stereo: Why you gotta hate, man
DJ Keef: Hate?  Oh no.  This is LOVE.

And then there was the time that this was delivered to my house. In a large box.